Is everyone intimidated by the neighbor’s opinion when they work in the yard? I am always aware when neighbors are watching me working in my yard. They might be concerned I’m going to pass out in this 100° heat. All I know is that I’m overly concerned with whether they think I’m mowing the lawn correctly or planting too close to the house. Is my yard tidy enough? Am I holding up my end of the neighborhood? Are they judging me?
Today, my neighbors are getting a new roof, and a crew is currently working on the top of their house. That isn’t my favorite time to be in the yard putting on a show for 8 or 9 contractors.
Surprisingly, I may not be alone in this obsession, according to artificial intelligence tools. Reddit posters even have a thread dedicated to this topic, and one of my favorite landscape architects, Phillip Watson, wrote a relatable post on Facebook about how he dealt with his neighbor’s actions.
Why do we care?
It is common to feel self-conscious, influenced, and even intimidated about how your yard looks, especially when compared to your neighbors. A desire for a well-maintained property, social pressure, or concerns about property values can be intimidating. But it’s crucial to find a balance between maintaining your space to your standards and accommodating the external opinions around you.
These are the most often cited reasons people care about what others think of their landscape choices:
- Social Pressure and HOA-Imposed Standards
- Property Values
- Personal Pride and Reputation
- Envy
Basic strategies to help you manage these feelings.
Focus on Your Priorities:
Determine what aspects of your yard are most important to YOU, and prioritize those. It isn’t healthy to be obsessed with what other people think of you or your home. Turn that obsession into inspiration and use it to create a personal statement.
Set Realistic Standards:
It’s okay to have a yard that reflects your style and preferences, even if it doesn’t perfectly match what others are doing. However, if you’ve ignored the outdoors for months and are now dealing with weeds and unsightly overgrowth, own it! Don’t expect to change it overnight. It will take time to transform.
There is a line between zoning violation and a perfectly manicured landscape. Walk the line until you get to your finish line.
Communicate with Neighbors (when appropriate):
If you have a good relationship with your neighbors, you can communicate with them about your yard maintenance and address any concerns.
Consider Professional Help:
I’m not recommending therapy. But if you’re struggling to maintain your yard, consider hiring a landscaper or lawn care service. Be clear about your expectations when you hire professionals. Landscapers in Florida have a reputation for being “mow and blow.” Since I’m fighting trees that grew from seed in my hedges, this isn’t my solution. Landscapers prefer to trim problem trees to an even height rather than removing the whole plant. Eventually, the tree grows back with more branches and becomes a bigger problem.
Remember that You Can’t Please Everyone:
It’s impossible to make everyone happy, so focus on creating a yard that you enjoy. Don’t forget this one. It isn’t your job to create a yard that pleases the neighbor.
Focus on Enjoying Your Yard:
Ultimately, your yard should be a place where you can relax and enjoy yourself, regardless of what others think. To thine own self be true!